Thanksgiving

Turkey, sweet potatoes, rolls, mountains of mashed potatoes topped with gravy, and casserole dishes full of foods you never thought could or should be in a casserole. For many this is only the beginning of a vast spread of traditional Thanksgiving dishes lining the dinner table for a holiday of abounding food, family and gratitude.

Some families celebrate Thanksgiving intimately, with their immediate members and their families favorite traditional dishes. Other families engage in large reunions with distant relatives, throwing large parties of Thanksgiving classics to celebrate the holiday.

For my family, it changes every year :)

Growing up, I mostly remember spending Thanksgiving at one of two places.

Some years we met at my Great Aunt's house in Stockton. They had a pool and land surrounding their house. Their golden retriever bounded around the backyard. The house was cozy and clean. We would color with my cousin Aaron, open an early Christmas present or two, and feast over ordirves (did you know it's actually spelt hors d'oeuvre?? That feels confusing so I'm spelling it how it sounds so you know what I'm talking about ;) ) while the Turkey cooked. These Thanksgivings are warm and fond in my memory full of a few key family members I have a strong relationship with, and the rest fading into the background of my memory, people I only sort of knew.

Other times we spent Thanksgiving at my Mimi and Poppies'. We have since continued to celebrate at their house many years. In addition to the Thanksgiving classics of mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, green bean casserole, and turkey, my Louisiana raised Mimi would make Shrimp Etouffee, a delicious rice salad, and whip cream jello salad. Not to mention she makes the only pumpkin pie I actually like. It's delicious.

Thanksgiving at their house was spent watching Disney and Hallmark movies on the TV (they had live tv at our Mimi and Poppies, we did not at home), helping Mimi bake pies or shell shrimp, and sitting at the folding kiddie table with my sisters eating piles of mashed potatoes. 

While we continue to enjoy Thanksgiving at our Mimi and Poppie's some years, our Thanksgivings continue to change. 

One year we met with a bunch of relatives from my Dad's side of the family in Santa Cruz. We ate Thanksgiving in a big hotel dining room with tables my Aunt had decorated in festive fall garb. We competed for McDonald's gift cards and played on the floor with connect toys. 

Another year, when I was in high school, we stayed home for Thanksgiving and spent it at our Pastor 'Uncle Shawn' and 'Aunt Debbie's house. Our found family. Pastor Shawn actually has the exact same birthdate as my mom's biological brother, fun fact. They were staying home for the holiday, all of their children grown and afar. We came over and enjoyed the most fun and relaxing holiday. It felt safe, fun, restful and full of gratitude. My sisters and I decided to make a YouTube video so I vlogged the Thanksgiving food and fellowship, and then I interviewed each person about something they were grateful for (including the dogs). 

Last year was my first Thanksgiving break in college. My freshman year the semester practically ended at Thanksgiving so I spent it mostly normally at my Mimi and Poppie's. 

But last year we met in Santa Cruz for the second time. My Alabama family: Aunty Tiffy, her family and my Aunt Suzy, as well as my Grandparents all met up with us to celebrate Thanksgiving over an incredible charcuterie board and makeshift spread of some store bought and some homemade dishes. 

One thing I did not clarify, is that around my sophomore year I discovered I was allergic to gluten and dairy. At our smaller Thanksgivings at Aunt Debbie's or Mimi and Poppie's it was easy to make dishes that I could eat. 

This Santa Cruz Thanksgiving was a bit different, a lot of the traditional foods I couldn't eat. But my Mom made sure to make a special lentil rice dish I could have, alongside turkey and the ordirves (I know, I know, I'm still spelling it wrong). I had flown into Santa Cruz for the trip, my first solo trip flying. I felt so grown up. But also absolutely exhausted. I passed out on the couch for several hours on Thanksgiving day, and as we celebrated the next few days on the Boardwalk and beach, I found myself losing my voice and coming down with a cold. 

I eventually found out I had Covid when I got back to school in my apartment. I had probably had it the whole time, which explains the extreme fatigue during the celebrations. My dad drove 14 hours in one day to take me home and make sure I was taken care of. That's a longer story, but that Thanksgiving has a mixed taste in my memory because of that. Regardless, its full of sweet memories walking along the beach with my dad and sisters, and the fun thrill of riding rollercoasters with my little cousin. 

This year is going to be a Thanksgiving even more different from the rest. 

Because whether we were adventuring in Santa Cruz, at a large family reunion at a Great Aunt's house from one side of the family or another, at found family friends houses, or chilling at a small gathering at Mimi and Poppie's, my family was together. My immediate family -- my Mama, Papa, three younger sisters and I--were together. 

But this year, they will be at Mimi and Poppie's enjoying Shrimp Etouffee and I will be here. It was too complicated and expensive to make traveling home for two days worth it. 

I don't need a pity party. I will see them in three weeks for Christmas break, and I'm actually quite excited for the relaxing Thanksgiving I have planned at a church family's house. But I am also a bit sad. I know it was the right decision. And I will see them soon. But it is also my first Thanksgiving away from them. Without them. 

My Grandpa is also in the hospital right now. While I wouldn't have seen him on Thanksgiving, the talk of family and the holiday makes me miss him, and I'm sad he isn't well. 

Yesterday, Epiphany, the George Fox song writing and story telling ensemble, presented a special Thanksgiving performance of stories. One of them was about a girl who lost her Grandma and attended the funeral the day before Thanksgiving. Though my relationship with my Grandpa sounds very different from that of her and her Grandma, my heart hurts a little bit celebrating this holiday, and not knowing if he will be staying with us a bit longer in this life, or leaving us for life in heaven with Jesus, celebrating and free, but leaving us sad in his absence. 

I also have more allergies now then before, with potatoes, tomatoes, soy, corn, legumes, and cashews added to the pre-existing list. Yet, somehow I've been blessed with a gluten free, dairy free family taking me in for Thanksgiving dinner and preparing a few 'Sophi friendly dishes.' 

I'm thankful for found family. I have a lot of found family back home, especially in my church. 

But I'm thankful that as I build roots here in Newberg too, I am finding family in my church up here, and family in my friends who I live daily life with. And I'm finding family in my sweet blessings of roommates. 

I am sad. I miss my family. I pray for my Grandpa and continue to have to trust God in uncertainty. 

But I also have joy and comfort from found family here. I have peace and assurance knowing God is with me. I have hope and excitement for the Christmas family time to come. And I have rest knowing I won't be expending my already fatigued body while traveling. 

This Thanksgiving is different. 

But hopefully, it will still be good. 

I'll eat tasty broccoli and sweet potatoes. I'll dress in my orange sweater and video chat my fam bam. And I'll enjoy the company of found family. 

Blessings to you and your people no matter where you find yourself this Thanksgiving. You are so loved, and I hope you experience that this Thanksgiving.

Sincerely, 

Sophi